I read blogs and feel so helpless. I want SO MUCH to do something for these people. I want to send them money, pay off their mortgage, find them a job, talk to Extreme Makeover, etc. Sometimes when I read them it makes me sad - like emotional sad. What is that?
Let's take for example - Moodymama.com - I have not a clue how I happened to stumble upon her blog, but I got hooked because she talks about bipolar illness openly and freely. I type some of that stuff for work and find it fascinating to read how she raises six kids, is still in love with their father, her husband, and lives with bipolar illness. One of her children just recently was diagnosed with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy. Sadly, there is a possibility he will not make it to thirty and right now he is six. The thought of that tears me up and I don't even know these people. In addition, I want to have enough money to be able to send her $1770 because they just received a bill for genetic tests AFTER insurance paid their “portion.”
Another example - the medical reports I type. Some of these patients are just plain - suck the system for all it's got because they could give a flying f*** about anything but themselves - kind of people. However, there are others that follow every rule, do exactly what the doctor asks, yet continually get hammered by all the other elements life throws on their plate. It makes my heart ache. I just want them to come to their doctor's appointment one day and have the doctor say here is a check. Go and buy yourself a car in good working condition so you can get to and from your doctors appointments and work, be a mother to your children, and live a full life.
I don't even want anything back or recognition. I just don't want to feel helpless.
It is frustrating. You want to do something, ANYTHING, to help. Any gesture seems insignificant compared to what they are going through, but you still want to try. And the gestures aren't insignificant. Sometimes the smallest thing can turn a day around, or just make things feel normal for a moment. Sometimes it is enough to know someone is listening.
ReplyDeleteBut you still feel helpless...
Feeling helpless is hard. When you can't "do," pray, that's my theory.
ReplyDeleteI feel this way so often too. It kills me at times, and I just can't read about any more sadness that I can't control.
ReplyDeleteI guess we can only do the things we can control, help those within our reach, find ways to make something matter. I bet you do those things already.
Just yesterday I was listening on the radio as the show hosts were saying that Ryan Seacrest spent $50,000 on ONE MEAL. It made me so sad. I spent the whole drive to work thinking of the people I could help, the wells I could dig, the bills I could pay for other people with that kind of cash. And it was blown on ONE MEAL. For ONE PERSON. I'm not judging him. I'm sure he does good stuff with his money too. But man, if I had that sort of money, I'd have the best time in the world spending it on people who needed it.