to keep my mouth shut.
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Me: Yay, you're pregnant! Congratulations! How far along are you?
[Jake - put that back!]
Checkout Girl: I'm five months now (rubbing her tummy)
Me: Oh my gosh! I'm so excited for you!
[Jake - I said put that back! Now! Stop!]
Checkout Girl: Yeah, we're excited too.
Me: It is such a beautiful and exciting time.
[Jake - If you don't stop I am taking back the light saber]
Checkout Girl: (giggling)
Me: Trust me it IS magical. It may not seem that way right this minute, but you have these magical moments that are indescribable. However, most of the time you're just counting down until bedtime.
Checkout Girl: I don't think that will be us because my husband is a high school teacher and I think I relate much better to children. So it won't be that hard.
Me: (smiling) That's SO great!
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Like I said, I have learned to keep my mouth shut.
She said that?! I am in disbelief.
ReplyDeleteBut not as much disbelief as I am in over the fact that YOU have an actual TREE that grows GRAPEFRUIT?! An actual TREE?! That grows GRAPEFRUIT? But you don't eat it?! I am going to try to put this in a way that you can relate with, because my shock and horror over you not eating your grapefruits is probably lost on you. So, how do I put this. Here I go:
Imagine that I casually mention, "Oh, I have this tree in my backyard. It grows these pesky five dollar bills. They're everwhere! I don't use five dollar bills, so I just make little paper airplanes out of them and fly them into oncoming cars." Wouldn't you be stunned? Stunned speechless? That's how I feel!
So here's what we need to do. We'll trade places. You can bring Jake to Portland with you and I'll bring Bennett down there with me, and Bennett and I will eat all your grapefruits until we never want to see another grapefruit again. Then we'll trade back. Husbands optional.
:)
You are SO awesome! I love your spunk!
ReplyDeleteYes, she actually said that. I am very proud of myself that I didn't try and reason with her, point anything out to her, or simply say in a smart-ass tone "Just wait!"
Your description of a tree growing five dollar bills worked because it prompted me to pick 2 grapefruits off the tree today. Now I have to figure out what to do with them. I'm going to post a picture so you can help me with knowing what type of grapefruit they are and how someone new to grapefruit should try them. K?